Pandasmom's Blog

living with PANDAS, not the furry ones…

Acceptance November 14, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — pandasmom @ 3:04 pm

We went to Washington DC with the hopes of curing our daughter.  We still have all the hope in the world that the treatment will help her.  But a strange thing has happened as a result of this “curative treatment”.  Instead of John and I facing the future with excitement of waiting for the cure to happen we are now looking to the future with acceptance.  Independently, but at almost the same time, we both came to the conclusion that we need to accept the situation we are in and not try so hard to “fix” it.

We’ve spent the last 11 months trying to “fix” A.  We’ve worked incredibly hard and I think we have done a fabulous job.  But all of the sudden, we realized that perhaps we should stop trying to fix her and instead work just on finding joy within the family we have been given.  I’m not sure how in the world we are going to accomplish this but this is the new goal.

Our current plan is to try to keep both girls as healthy as possible.  This includes both their mental health and physical health.  Next, we need to work on our family’s overall happiness.  We’ve been in crisis mode for so long that the happiness of our family has greatly suffered.  Luckily we all like each other a lot and we will be ok.  But it is time to focus on our family and put some joy back in our lives.  This is going to include employing helpers which we really haven’t done in over a year.  But I think the success of our family depends on our getting help. 

John and I have been thinking about this for a few days now.  The more time I spend thinking about this the more I think that acceptance will likely change things for us.  It is certainly not going to change A’s condition, but hopefully it will help us bring a bit more laughter and joy back to our family.  And if A gets “fixed” from the PEX then that would be just an added benefit.

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