I hope very much that this post will not be taken as offensive to anyone who has a child (or they themselves have) with visible needs.
During a good moment, a stranger looking at A would see a perfect child. In this respect, we are extremely lucky. We have a wonderful, beautiful daughter. However, with perceived perfection come expectations; it appears to be human nature. The expectations do not fall short even with us, her parents. We are not immune to expecting her to be able to act a certain way, perform at a certain level or conform to society at an age appropriate level.
Sometimes I wonder how things would be different if we were dealing with a condition that were visible to everyone. If we had something that didn’t require a 20 minute, in-depth explanation that sometimes only ends up confusing people more than when we started. Would the difficulties surrounding the PANDAS be more easily accepted? Would people, her parents included, have more sympathy for the constant difficulties A faces all day long? I would never wish for a different affliction than what we have, I’m just wondering if visibility brings about more compassion.