Pandasmom's Blog

living with PANDAS, not the furry ones…

Preschool graduation May 25, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — pandasmom @ 8:16 pm

Today was the last day of preschool for A.  I’ve been sad about this day for quite a while because I know how much A will miss school.  She thinks preschool is the best place in the world.  Each time I’ve thought about the end of preschool though, I only looked at it from A’s perspective.  I never spent any time thinking how I might feel.

Today’s pickup was extremely emotional for me.  I was shocked at my response!  The teachers gave the children photo books of themselves throughout the year.  The pictures were beautiful and simple candid shots of preschool life.  Looking at the pictures was extremely painful for me though.  In at least 75% of the pictures, A either has puffy cheeks from taking steroids or she has her IV line still in her hand from having just been discharged from the hospital.  She still looks so happy in all of the pictures though! 

And just like at the beginning of the year, all the parents were teary.  But I was teary for a different reason.  I certainly wasn’t teary because my child is a whole year older.  Who has time for that thought?  I was beyond emotional because preschool has been the one constant positive in our life over the last year.  A has looked forward to going to school each and every day.  She acts appropriate there.  The staff understands her and is caring towards her and she is simply free to be a child at preschool.  I think it is the one place I felt safe too.  And now it is over for the summer. 

Will next fall find John and I crying because we aren’t sure A can attend?  Or because we are sad that our child is a year older?  Wouldn’t it be wonderful to cry because she is a year older…

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